My favorite coffee shop in town roasts their own beans. They announced that they’d partnered with a local brewery to produce a coffee stout, and I knew what our Friday evening plans were: try a new brewery for dinner! How exciting to text my husband: “Michigan loves beer. We hate winter. Let’s get some seasonal brew and make the best of it!”
Before I hit send on that text, I checked out the brewery’s website. First appetizer: Roasted peanuts in the shell.
For about 30 seconds I got excited about going out, and forgot about The Child’s peanut allergy. I got excited about having a spontaneous beer. I was feeling bonus awesome points for knowing the people who had roasted the coffee that was going to be in MY LOCALLY CRAFTED BEER. It was a beautiful 30 seconds of sanctimonious bliss.
The Child is three. There is no way we can go to a place slathered in peanut shells and dust.
I hate it, you guys.
It’s not The Worst Thing.
Yes, I have that perspective.
When a locally-sourced, organic doughnut shop opened in town, I teared up a little bit. First I cried, because I live in a place awesome enough to have that kind of buzz-word small business. Then I cried because The Child and I can’t walk over there this afternoon and get one.
(Short explanation, if you need it: Unless bakeries are nut-free, they’re a nut allergy no-no. This is the first thing you learn after diagnosis: Bakeries are the worst. Imagine a stray piece of that fair-trade-dark-chocolate-peanut crumble falling on to that “nut-free” miso-butterscotch doughnut. Then imagine me in the Emergency Room with my kid. Or worse.)
Again, not going to the doughnut shop is not The Worst Thing. Hey–I have a friend who volunteered to bring me a doughnut, then distract my child while I ate it. That’s a Good Thing, that friend. But I’ll hashtag gratitude some other day.
It’s not that I want the damn doughnut or want the damn beer. It’s that I want a life that I’m not living. My kid and I aren’t having Mommy and Me lunches at a favorite Thai restaurant. I’m not merrily trying new brands of…anything (without researching it first).
Okay, ya. I lied. I kinda do just want that damn beer.
That’s all this is about. I want to take my family to that bar, and have that damn beer.